Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Go Larry Go!

I would like to take this opportunity to express my gratitude and support for Senator Larry "family values" Craig in his quest to proudly strike a defiant "wide stance" and remain a national punchline until the bitter end of his congressional term. It just doesn't get any better than this. Despite the best efforts of his party's leaders such as Mitch McConnell, Mitt Romney, and John McCain, he has decided to remain "the turd that won't flush" -- another shining example of Republican hypocrisy for voters to ponder all the way up to election time. It takes a special kind of jerk to spend your entire career voting against rights for gay people when you're a closeted gay yourself -- to troll nasty, stinking public restrooms in search of clandestine encounters to satisfy your sexual desires, while you publicly vilify people who are honest about their sexual preference and just want to be accepted as human beings like everybody else. To whip out a Senate ID card when caught in the act, in an attempt to intimidate the arresting officer, and when that doesn't work, to try lying your way out of it under interrogation. To plead guilty two months later, while trying to hide it from your family, your colleagues, and your constituents. To promise to resign, and then renege on that promise, all the while still righteously proclaiming that you are "not gay" and that you were "entrapped", trying in vain to withdraw your guilty plea. To drag your poor wife on national television time after time to suffer public humiliation in the name of a selfish, petty, delusional game that you can't possibly win.

I salute you Larry Craig. You epitomize the modern Republican Party.

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